Pissed Off Pontification – Know Your Role And Shut Your Mouth
Somebody has to say it. A common rumbling amongst many of the guys I know in the Midwest (and I have a couple of specific cities in mind) have noticed that there are women in their cities with “inflated senses of self.” What do I mean by this? Well, everybody appreciates confidence. But to be confident is to know what you are bringing to the table and knowing that it’s competitive. The problem lies in that there are some women who think that what they bring to the table is more than what they are bringing. It’s not even arrogance; I don’t have a word to describe this. Here’s a scenario that might explain what I mean:
An unkempt, unshaven, poorly spoken, unemployed man goes out and thinks he deserves the finest chick in the place.
We would all tell that man that he’s reaching too high – that he needs to recognize his place in the pantheon at the moment. It’s not impossible that he could end up with the finest looking woman in the place – but I wouldn’t call it very probable either. Moreover, if you’re the finest woman in the club and some dusty, stinking guy comes up to you expecting you to fawn over him and his “impressive” resume, you wouldn’t really jump at the chance to talk to him, would you?
Well, that is exactly what happens here. As one of my boys put it, “4′s think they’re 6′s. 6′s think they’re 8′s. 8′s think they’re 10′s.” Folks must be blind to some simple things – you are what you are, nothing more and nothing less. Know your place, not just what you think you are. It’s about knowing one’s self-worth – if you inflate it, it’s still artificial just like if you don’t think highly enough of yourself. Certainly, this is a tricky battle (and one that crosses men and women), but I have to say there are some cities where it feels like this is part of the culture – if you can put on a dress and have a half decent conversation you are the shit. The truth according to me? There are a lot of people high on their own supply and telling others to do the same, or culturally exposing others to the same behaviors such that this disturbing trend perpetuates without anybody saying anything. I’m through being quiet on this one.
When I was in Atlanta, this problem didn’t exist. I surmise it’s because ALL of the women were fine and doing big things, so there’s a lot more competition and as such, you get a better sense of your self-worth relative to the market. Take a city like my hometown, the sense of competition has dwindled and as a result self-worthiness has gotten inflated. I’m sick of it. I’ve seen some of these same women with inflated senses of self get buckwild for literally no reason. They turn their noses up at solid guys who are doing well for themselves because they think they should get better when they’re not bringing the same level to these guys – every bone in my body wants to yell, “Who the hell do you think you are? You ain’t Beyonce, you ain’t no celebrity, you’re a regular ol’ bottom bitch who needs to get that through your thick skull.”
Why does this piss me off? Because if these women would recognize how much (or little, in this case) they bring to the table, they would see how ordinary they are. And this isn’t an indictment on them; there are many successful, happy, ordinary men and women out here. They probably know more about their self-worth and how to build it like a credit score and not inflate it like an economy gone awry. I know this could look all bad and misogynistic and the like, but this is something I’ve noticed. I could have it wrong, but when I keep hearing this from guys who are doing well for themselves, not dusty, funky no-good guys, I can’t quite shake that this stuff is happening. Quite frankly, these women should:
(Note Jim Ross saying, “I second that.”)